I can’t stop crying, for the first time in ages, I rarely cry.
Everything is overwhelming.
I can’t sleep because my chest is tight and my head is spinning.
I feel like life has given me no option but to die, even though that is not really what I want.
No one has any answers for me so what is the point?
Part of me thinks maybe I could run away, but run away from what?
I can’t run from myself.
Shoot me.
I have had an eating disorder for eight years, among other mental health problems.
I am twenty-two years old.
I do not encourage but I am here for anyone.
This is just a space to let everything out. • Ask me anything.
Untitled
I am twenty-two years old.
I do not encourage but I am here for anyone.
This is just a space to let everything out. • Ask me anything.
Untitled
Ender.
I suppose I should try and sleep if there is any hope of me achieving anything tomorrow. I feel like maybe I am scared of going to sleep because then it means tomorrow will come. Part of me doesn’t give a fuck about anything but mostly I give too much of a fuck about everything, my life just going down the drain once again.
Email from tutors asking why I have been AWOL.
I am not sure ‘because I see no future and want to die’ is an acceptable answer.
Hmm.
Sleeping.
I am sleeping so much.
Sleeping means not worrying, not eating, not thinking, not really existing.
It just makes everything worse when I wake up again.
Yesterday I slept all day until evening then ended up eating and purging.
When to sleep again in the early hours of the morning and slept again today until now, 5pm.
I missed my lecture and have done no practice for my exam.
I am going to see my old counsellor next week though so I think it will be good to get a whole bunch of crap off my chest and maybe get some suggestions from her.
